Family and Identity

I do not think anyone should get to decide, quietly and on my behalf, whether I am allowed to grieve. That is what this has come down to for me. My grandad died on Tuesday, and I was not told. I found out without the basic courtesy that most people would expect from family. Now I am left asking the next painful question: will I be told about my grandad’s funeral? Part of me already thinks I know the answer. If I was not told he had died, why would I suddenly be told when the

Yes, I think my dad avoided telling me. I do not think this was a misunderstanding, a missed message, or one of those awkward family moments where everyone assumes someone else has passed the news on. Yesterday, I found out my grandad had died that morning. Not from my dad. Not from anyone on my dad’s side of the family. I found out through my mum, who had been told by my brother, who had been told by my dad. That chain of information says everything. My dad has my contact de

Sometimes the smallest online detail can hit harder than a direct argument. A friend request that never comes. A name appearing in a mutual friend list. A profile quietly becoming visible again. Someone deleting you without saying a word. On its own, it might seem petty or easy to brush off. But when it sits on top of years of awkwardness, rejection, silence, and things said behind closed doors, it stops feeling small. Before I get into it, I know it has been a while since my

No seventeen-year-old should have to give up education because the adults and systems around them fail to provide what they are meant to provide. Work can build character. Work can teach discipline. Work can even rescue you when everything else falls apart. But there is a big difference between choosing work and being pushed into it because the money is not there. In my previous post, I spoke about having to leave education and start working at McDonalds. That did not last lo

Dropping out of college at 16 can look like failure from the outside. In my case, it was not rebellion, laziness, or a lack of ambition. It was what happens when a young person runs out of options before they have even had a proper chance to start. That is the part people often miss. When someone leaves education early, the easy story is that they did not try hard enough. They made bad choices. They threw away an opportunity. But in 2007, my life did not feel like a list of c

A blanket ban on social media for under-16s may sound like protection, but for many LGBTQ young people it could cut off one of the few safe routes to support, language, and belonging. The UK’s push to make the internet safer for children comes from a real concern. Young people can face bullying, harmful content, grooming, addiction-style app design, and pressure that adults barely understand themselves. None of that should be brushed aside. But a ban is a blunt tool. It treat

When I first started using social media around 2002 to 2003, the landscape was very different from today. Platforms like Bebo and Myspace were the main hubs for teenagers and young adults to connect, share, and express themselves. I was a big fan of Myspace, where I didn’t just meet people locally but connected with others from all over the world. It was a place where I discovered unique personalities like Jeffree Star, known for his bright pink hair and bold fashion choices

Every June, Pride Month brings vibrant celebrations of identity, love, and community. With my local Pride festival just around the corner, I find myself torn. On one hand, Pride is a time to honour freedom and self-expression. On the other, I’ve noticed a growing presence of sexual fetish displays at these events. These festivals are meant to be welcoming and family-friendly, yet some of the costumes and behaviours seem out of place, especially with children attending. This r

When I tried to take my own life, everything changed. What followed was not just a battle with my mental health but also a struggle with how the people around me, especially at school, responded. My mum decided to keep me out of school for months because she didn’t trust the school to protect me or prevent another crisis. Instead of support, the school pushed back hard. They threatened my mum with fines if I didn’t return and even lowered my grades. This is my story of naviga

Growing up as a Navy brat, you might expect my story to be filled with tales of the sea, ships, and maybe even Sea Cadets. But instead, my dad signed me up for Air Cadets, which is connected to the Royal Air Force. If you’re wondering why he didn’t send me to Navy or Sea Cadets, you’re not alone. Here’s the real story behind that choice, and how it shaped me in unexpected ways. The Simple Reason: Convenience At the time, where we lived, there was no local Navy or Sea Cadet un

Growing up, I carried a heavy burden of programmed racism. I want to be clear from the start: I do not condone racism in any form. The views I held as a teenager are not the views I hold today. This post is a personal reflection to help you understand why I was racist as a young person and where those harmful beliefs came from. It is a story about how family influence shaped my early mindset and how I eventually changed for the better. The Family Influence That Shaped My Earl

Moving to a new city can be a fresh start, full of promise and new friendships. But sometimes, it also brings unexpected challenges, especially when it comes to matters of the heart. When I moved to London , living on a military estate in the northwest, near Harrow, I quickly found a friend who became my world. Yet, that friendship soon turned into my first experience of love and rejection, shaping how I saw myself and the city around me. A quiet London tube station platform